2012: My Year in Review

Whew! We survived the Mayan Apocalypse... that was a close one! It's a good thing the weathermen are always wrong...

2012 was full of its ups and downs, but I am happy to report that there were far more ups, and with 5 days left in the year, I've been reflecting on all that has gone down. Here is a summary of the highlights:

Tune Ice

The month of December has brought forth the most posts here at my humble blog since June, exactly half a year ago. I suppose there are a few reasons for this, one of which being that I started a new job that allows me a little more free time in the evening than I once had. Another is that, while many of us get really contemplative closer to the start of a new year, this is the time I usually find myself looking back over the one we're about to put behind us... and whether related to what I'm thinking or not, writing is my outlet.

The Hook

Keeping up with new TV shows or staying interested in a particular series enough to watch it every week has never really been my thing. I'm more inclined to get into a random documentary on Netflix, like Happy - as a sidebar, definitely one I'd have to recommend, as a friend recommended it to me, and I loved it. If the nerd inside you appreciates quantum physics and the search for what happiness really is, you will also love it.

That said, there has been a time or two... or five... when I've had someone tell me I just have to see this show or that, so I check it out, and - lo and behold - after a lil bit I'm hooked. Of course, I usually find out about these shows about 2 or 3 seasons in on average, so I end up catching up to the current season via a marathon episode-watching event - complete with lots of wine, snacks, and pjs. It's exhilarating, trust me. :D

So, recently it happened again with a series called The Walking Dead, and by the first half of episode one, I was hopelessly hooked. This show had thrown out the bait, left me looking at it kind of sideways and squinty-eyed, made me nibble, slowly reeled me in, and then ~*¡WHAM!*~... hooked was I.  Rather than having me pondering a zombie apocalypse, however, I immediately appreciated how smart these producers were in the way that they grabbed my attention. They got it. And now they had me. That was Phase 1...

"Wild Geese"

A couple of years ago, a very dear colleague / friend / mentor of mine shared this poem with me - the first line of which I've made sort of a mantra: "You do not have to be good..." 

What a great statement. I'm a perfectionist for life, but part of my conscious effort to overcome that to whatever extent possible is recognizing that not only do I not have to be perfect, I do not even have to be good. Now that is profound. I do not have to be good. I can just be - whatever it is that I am that year, that month, that day, that moment - and I can accept that for what it is. Lovely.

"Wild Geese" by Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

The More You Know: You might not be as weird as you think...

Allow me to tell you a few things about me:

All Good Things

If the first thought you had after reading the title was “… must come to an end,” then you’re a pessimist and already I’m feeling better about myself.

I love.

Sometimes this complete (though very brief) sentence is weighed down with lots of (WARNING: new word incoming...) extrapredicate-y things:

I love chocolate.
I love to wear pink.
I love running on Sundays.
I love my parents.

That's all well and good, but many times this feeling I have can be summed up without any of those additional qualifiers. Just plainly, I love.

Oh, Sandy

We joke around here about starting up a drinking game where anytime someone says "Before Katrina" or "After Katrina," you have to take a drink. If we really did this we'd all be fall down drunks at any casual get-together...

It's a fact that is tightly woven into the fabric of our lives, but for the most part, I for one have pretty well adjusted... for the purposes of continuing normal life anyway. Even though it's always there, we've responded to social expectations that we "get over it" by doing exactly that. After all, you're not supposed to grieve after a certain point or people start to get persnickety and judgmental.

I always loved this one too: "Well you should be thankful you have your life." Yes. My life. As in, I am still able to take breaths in and out. Of course that is wonderful and deeply meaningful if your LIFE consists of standing still in nothingness taking breaths in and out. Subtract your neighbors and friends and family who live close to you, your local store, all of your photos and mementos with special meaning, your home... and then tell those who have lost all of those very large parts of their lives that it's really all OK, and they should just be happy to be alive. When you're the person on the receiving end of such a comment, it sounds unbelievably ludicrous. And it is.

The crazy thing is, there is no "getting over it." It lives deep within us, but from time to time something triggers its rise to the surface.

Fancy Coffee Maker Blues

Kitchen Aid: A Haiku 

You have but one job 

Make coffee in the morning 

Please don't fail me now

Tips for Travelers: Jet Lag

I haven't been everywhere, but I've been a place or two, and along the way I've learned some things...

JET LAG: The DOs & DON'Ts

Especially when it comes to transocean flights, these are tips that I've learned by attending the School of Hardknocks. Do what you will with them, but from here on, you can't say that no one told you.

Sometimes I feel like a...

Sad Kitty

Write Things to Say

After all of that writing in June, I stopped for a bit. The next time I wrote anything was a week or so later when I expanded my thoughts a bit more on this book I have in my heart. When I left the café that evening I was absolutely beaming - I'd had a breakthrough, and my scattered thoughts had come full circle. What a glorious feeling! And then I stopped.

End of the Month

Firstly, I'd like to say "you're welcome" to Starbucks & PJs for all the money I spent there while writing this month. I'd also like to send out a "you're welcome" to the people who own the Internet because I have used it much more since starting this project. And a very big "you're welcome" goes out to Blogger - you never would have seen as much activity from my blog if it hadn't been for my ambitious nature.

Now for the rest of the post...

ArachNOphobia

My friend says I should write a post about how I have a problem because of how much I don't like spiders. But I say THIS IS NOT A PROBLEM. It is normal to dislike a venomous, evil, loathsome creature such as the spider. So I am just EXTRA normal. And I don't want to talk about it anymore.

What I would like to talk about is... well... damn it. Now that I've brought them up, I can't think about anything else. :( I really, really despise spiders. I do have to take issue with the word "arachnophobia" though.

Arachnophobia is defined in different places as different things. Wikipedia says that it's is "a specific phobia, the fear of spiders and other arachnids such as scorpions." The other arachnids are not the ones I have a problem with, however. Scorpions, though I've never confronted one personally, don't make me feel like I'm going to vomit. Same for ticks, which are also arachnids... those don't freak me out either. The medical dictionary gets more specific, though, saying it's "an abnormal fear of spiders."

Umm... can somebody please explain to me exactly what might be normal about liking spiders? I say THAT is a disorder: arachnophilia. Yeah, let's add that one to the Wiktionary: arachnophilia - n. the abnormal love of spiders.

Custom Road Signs

So, I've said a thing or two in my little blog regarding how I feel about driving laws and other drivers. To piggy-back on this idea, I have created just a few custom road signs that I would like to see on the highways of North America:

First World Problems

After writing my post yesterday (where the poor stick fellow took one for the team because my hair dryer didn't work... R.I.P.), I realized that being frustrated by a hair dryer that doesn't work would be an absolutely preposterous idea to someone who has absolutely nothing.

"You mean you have a machine that blows your hair dry? Here we just call that the wind."

That's when I started really thinking about how ridiculous some of our "problems" are, did some searching and stumbled upon this tumblr site full of First World Problems. I am, of course, very likely the last person to have heard about this site to-date, but for me, this was a very timely finding.

I can't think of anything we have to complain about here in the Land of the Privileged that doesn't fall into this category. Every single problem we have here in the First World is a first world problem. Just in an effort to try and prove my very own self wrong (how's that for rhetorical arguing?), I tried to think of just ONE problem that wouldn't fit the description. Just one. It didn't work out so well. Here is the list I brainstormed:

Death by Letter

Forget color by number. I give you... DEATH BY LETTER. Who was the control freak that invented the color by number idea anyway? "Hey kids, this hat should be red, those shoes should be green... NO! NO! NO! I said the shoes are green! The hat is red!! You've ruined everything!" Do you know what that kind of thing did to a kid who was already well on her way to being (or possibly even hardwired from birth to be) a rule-follower? Maybe I should have discussed that with my therapist...

So here I am. It's like that scene in Limitless where the letters fall from the ceiling all around Eddie Mora... except without the letters and far less typing because NZT doesn't exist. Also I'm on my couch, not at a very neat desk, wide awake right now trying my best to continue my challenge to write every day for an entire month, but there just aren't so many words available at this time of night.

The Value of Things

I've found myself having this conversation dozens of times over the last 7 years, and as time goes on not only is it easier to have, but it also serves as a healthy reminder to myself of what is important... and what is not.

It doesn't take a catastrophic disaster like 8 feet of water in your house after Hurricane Katrina to experience the loss of things. Sometimes we accidentally misplace things we hold dear. Sometimes those things are taken away from us. "Stuff goes away" is a lesson we've all faced at one point or another. But it's the lesson we take away from those moments that really helps to shape how much value we put on things.

What I have learned is this: Things are just things, and buy insurance.

Give Us This Day Our Daily Possibilities

I tend to be the kind of person who wants to do it all, even when doing it all is not possible. How many times have I been told, "only do today what can be done today." This, I believe, is very good advice, but when I originally got the idea for this post, the entire concept was very different than what is about to be written...

I'd like to take this opportunity to turn this idea on its head and flip it inside out: "Only do what can be done today" some days is the equivalent of "Only do today what you can possibly find it in yourself to do." Eliminate the full realm of a day's possibilities. It might be that you "can" do that abbreviated list of things (because you cut out certain other things that would overextend you), but should you? Should you do all the possible things every day? I say no. While it's a good general rule, there are definite exceptions.

Some days, it's all you can do to just put one foot in front of the other. Some days, eating 3 proper meals is a grand accomplishment. Some days, if you remember to feed the dog, you feel like you should have been awarded a medal. Some days, just knowing what is possible for you on that day and just doing that is plenty enough.

Addiction

These days, people are hysterical over growth hormones in chicken and the addictive properties of foods high in fat. but no one is questioning the apparent co-conspiracy between cookie manufacturers and milk producers to keep us hooked. The addictive properties of milk, especially when combined with ovaltine, are only heightened by those of cookies, which can lead to a variety of symptoms, including but not limited to midnight cravings, impulsive trips to the grocery store, and rapid shifts in mood (from feelings of euporia and excitement to feelings of self-loathing and disappointment). Explore the problem that is... cookie and milk addiction...

Social Etiquette

Let's just get straight down to it. Here's the situation: you're walking somewhere... anywhere. Maybe it's a sidewalk that runs past a peaceful looking tree (per the diagram). In any case, wherever you are, you're walking behind someone who apparently does not have a single thing to do, whereas you, on the other hand, do. You have lots of things to do. Lots and lots of things! But those people with no things to do do not seem to notice that you are frantically looking for a polite way to circumvent them as they casually stroll along. Let's examine your possibilities in this scenario:

Redefining Heroism

We've all been asked the question at some point in life in some form or another: "Who's your hero/ine?" Of course, we have those stock hero cards in our pockets at all times that we can flash if we're not entirely sure of the answer... dad, mom, soldiers, firemen, a teacher... But if you really had to name a hero/ine - a person who is admired for his or her courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities, according to the dictionary definition - who would it be and why? Could you even come up with an honest answer?

Oh the many varieties of weirdness...

You've been there before. There you are, in a social sitch, and it happens. You go for a hug and get a handshake... or vice versa. You're with people you've just met, and you say something awkward, which they only half hear, and suddenly silence overcomes your group. Awkwardness. It's difficult to put a finger on exactly what creates it all the time, but one thing is sure - we all know it when we're around it.

Of course, we could just ignore it and continue on like nothing happened... but isn't that just as weird? It's a conundrum.

SUPPORTOSAURUS!

Click me!

 Today I'm highlighting a project that I am absolutely loving. Artist, dinosaur-lover, and creator of the web comic The Underfold, Brian Russell, has written and illustrated a children's book called What I Remember About Dinosaurs. The heart of the inspiration for his book can be best summed up in a statement he made about how this idea was born --

I wanted to make a book to share my love for dinosaurs and hopefully inspire a new generation to learn all about these creatures that have captivated the hearts and minds of millions of people.  So I compiled a humorous book of facts I could remember."

Keepin' the Beat

Whether I'm running or working out on the elliptical, there is a soundtrack that can capture the various feelings I have from lacing up my tennis shoes to cooling down afterward. If you're a runner (or a beast on the elliptical like me (; ), consider these 35 minutes of aurally ingestible stimulants as on the house. If you are not, consider these some of my any-other-time music recommendations because they sure are fun at any time. Enjoy. :)

Adoption

I find myself saying all the time that someone is so adorable and wonderful that I want to "adopt" him or her, and sometimes I get teased for this, but it's true. These are very rarely children, though. While that type of adoption is a fabulous thing, what I mean by this is that I just want to scoop this person up and keep him or her around me to just exude that preciousness. I realize that this is quite strange... and it's difficult to explain, really... but allow me to try...

Buy Local

There are so many trends these days with regard to the foods we should and should not eat. Trends toward organic, raw, whole, all natural, gluten-free, vegan, homegrown, grain-fed, free range, pesticide/hormone-free foods have gotten people into a veritable frenzy. It's difficult to even go grocery shopping without tremendous guilt from the time you enter the door until you leave. If I take my items to the checkout counter, and I put hormone-injected chicken up there next to organic peanut butter, I look like a fool. You can't just put one good thing next to a bad thing... they negate each other. It's simple math.

*SIDEBAR* So, here I am enjoying this very delicious red wine, wondering to myself, "Why isn't this post writing itself right now?" I could write a post just on the benefits of red wine... and now getting back to my point:

Rattle This

It's true that I am often an open-book. It would be difficult for me to be anything different, but this sometimes gives people the impression that they know more about me than they really do. It's easy to take the sum of my mannerisms and things I say and decide that I am like this or like that. Please allow me to set the record straight.

Art is Art

Have you ever been so inspired by something that it just keeps coming back to mind time and time again? It might have been a film, a song, a view, a dream, a place... or even a person. This has happened to me more times in my life than I can even dare to count, but one such catalyst for inspiration was discovered unexpectedly at a guest art exhibit at the Frist Museum in Nashville, Tennessee. The artist was Lalla Essaydi, and the effect was long-lasting. On that little day trip, I was with my sweet friend Samina, and it was such a great trip that I even remember the very wonderful ahi tuni salad I ate in the café at the entrance of the museum. Good times. :)

Internet Killed the Printed Media Star

On May 24th, things changed. There was an announcement that The Times-Picayune, New Orleans' daily paper since 1837, would discontinue its daily service - reducing to 3 publications per week - in favor of focusing more attention toward the newspaper's website, nola.com. Now, naturally people in NOLA are upset, but there's definitely more to the story than might at first meet the eye. When they called it the Big Easy, they weren't referring to this city's ability to embrace change.

Now, before I delve into a full-on editorial, when it comes to highly sensitive issues like this one, I try to visit both sides and really know the heart of each. That stated, I don't have a concrete opinion formed on this one... at least not one that will lead to a hysterical rant. It's just not that simple...

Wouldn't it be better if...

Quantum Psychology

Let's get straight to the moral of the story: When you observe something, it changes. It no longer behaves the same way as if you hadn't observed it. Is it possible that we give too much power to circumstances in our lives by focusing on them too much?

And now for the science:

Movie Review: Win Win [2011]

For this Sunday morning post, I've chosen to share a review I did of the movie Win Win from 2011 starring the great Paul Giamatti and the very charming and humorous Amy Ryan. I first saw Win Win at a small film festival in Memphis in 2011 and was mostly just going to hang out with a friend of mine... but certainly got much more than I bargained for.

Before I'd seen it, I honestly couldn't remember the last time I had genuinely enjoyed every moment of a movie. This film, which I went into with virtually no expectations - with the exception of knowing I’d see yet another stellar performance from Paul Giamatti - breathed new life into my affinity for movies and raised the bar for other films I'd see. It’s a drama, it’s a comedy; it’s dysfunctional, but sometimes it just works – it’s life. The script and the acting were so honest that it was hard to not be drawn in almost immediately.

Going the Distance

As you may or may not know, running is something I enjoy doing from time to time, though I can't say it's something I'm great at. About a year ago I had worked up to running a straight mile... not a fast one, mind you, but a mile no less. At that time, I would keep close track of the time... trying to push myself closer and closer to the coveted 10-minute mile, but that never happened. Then for a long time I stopped running... mostly because it got cold, and I do not do cold. More on that some other time...

But what I'm realizing is that I was measuring the wrong thing. It's not speed I'm after... it's distance.

Unacceptable

I am a pretty tolerant, patient person. But even I, your humble blog author, find certain things absolutely unacceptable. I can't even quite express them in words, so I chose instead to draw some drawings. As a quick aside, yes a lot of these have to do with driving. Yes, I like to drive fast. I'm still a rule-follower, but even I know a stupid rule when I see one, and I do like to get where I'm going... quickly. That does not mean that I am an unsafe driver, though! I like to refer to it as "driving with intention." Everyone should drive so intentionally. ;)

Et voilà:

[P]erceived [M]adness [S]yndrome

It's madness, I tell you. I recognize this. If you are a female, you will very likely know exactly what it is I'm talking about. If you are a male, do not attempt to understand it... logic will not help you here. Rather, keep this as a weapon in your coffer for safekeeping. It might just save you one day. Trust Stacie.

IMAGINARY

im·ag·i·nar·y /iˈmajəˌnerē/ adj. existing only in the imagination

I've spoken to lots of people who say that, as a child, they enjoyed the company of imaginary friends. This is perfectly normal and natural, and you only think it's weird if you didn't have any. Here's a diagram to help you understand:

Masquerade

There is a reason masks can be simultaneously scary and beautiful... especially those used for Mardi Gras and masquerades. They're decorated so lovely, designed to draw attention to themselves, to elicit admiration. At the same time, though, what you're beholding is merely a shield - an elaborate disguise whose sole purpose is to conceal the identity of the face behind it. Now, I don't have the slightest clue where this ritual began, and I have no intention of slipping into the Wikipedia wormhole right now to find out. What I do know, though, is that it's no secret that we wear these metaphorical masks on a daily basis. But I have to wonder - why has this been so often regarded as a bad thing? Is it even fair to expect that a person completely reveal every little aspect of his personality, attitudes, opinions, etc. in every situation? Isn't it actually preferable that we sometimes hide certain things at certain times for the sake of harmony or social acceptance? In other words, is it ok to be who you are at all times, to be true to you, without just laying out all of who you are on the sidewalk for everyone all the time?

Monday Red Beans

On this first Monday in June, I feel it's only appropriate to pay homage to my place of birth with a short post to get the week started.

June 1 marked the official start of hurricane season, and it's been hot as hell down on the dirty coast, but there is a reason I'm proud to live here. This city has more culture in its pinky toe than most places have entirely. We identify ourselves very strongly with some things, and one of those things is the reason for this post's title. If you're from here or familiar, you saw that and nodded. If you're not, a New Orleans tradition that can't be stopped is red beans & rice on Mondays. Who knows why that really started, but I've heard that we eat red beans on Mondays because Mondays used to be the day the ladies would go out and do the washing, so they needed something that could essential "cook itself" all day long on the stove for dinner that evening. But here in New Orleans you can't just use any old red kidney bean to do the job. No, no... Camellia brand red beans is synonymous with red beans. Why? Because my mama uses Camellia red beans, her mom uses Camellia red beans, and if you're from here, ya mom 'n 'em probably use Camellia red beans, too. ;)

Now I'm not going to venture to get into all of what makes this city so special... I did, after all, call this a "short post"... So what I will do instead is let you hear it, feel it. The music here is like no other... it's charming and inspiring, and I chose two videos today that each bring to life a unique piece of that New Orleans flavor. Enjoy!

Follow the Rules, Part 2: Language Fail

So yesterday we explored rule following and one of its consequences on my life. Well, here's another little story for you... and one which has haunted me for years. 14 years, to be exact. When I was in Driver's Ed., I wanted to be the best little driver that instructor had ever seen. I was going to win Driver's Ed. What happened while we were driving, though, is really a result of a problem with the English language...

Follow the Rules, Part 1: Social Fail

I've always been an overachiever.

Wow. You poor little reader. I see what happened there. Surely you're thinking to yourself, "Wait... you can't just start a blog like that... There's no context... It's just *BAM!* Here's a fast and furious glimpse into a random blogger's psyche. In ya. face." Ok, ok... I see your point. Let's take a step back.

I like to do things well. Actually, when I say "do things well," what I mean is that I've been told by friends, family, and a therapist that I am a perfectionist. Please don't ogle me. I am, after all, only human...

The 612 Project: #1

It's official: The 612 Project is underway. I've committed to a blog-a-day during the month of June, and here it goes. I've considered, reflected, contemplated... written, invented, rehashed, and re-evaluated. This blog is a mere speck in the blogosphere, a tiny corner of the Internet, a large part of my life, and a huge piece of me. I'm feeling challenged and inspired... and inspired to challenge.

[Many thanks to George Carlin - {R.I.P.} - for the very clever opening monologue that unexpectedly inspired the above ramblings.]

I Feel an Idea Coming on...

You may or may not know this (depending on just how long you've been subjected to my nonsense), but this blog - Ponderings & Pensées - was originally hosted on blogger as http://aquirkaday.blogspot.com. It still gets you here, but I abandoned it for the much more fun (for me) staciedenola.com. I don't remember quite why I came up with "a quirk a day" so many years ago, but this humble blog has never lived up to such a name. Actually, it never was even intended to be a daily blog... things in my brain sometimes just... "happen." It doesn't necessarily require rhyme or reason...

That said, I'm conjuring up a personal challenge for myself for this summer. What I am considering is... a blog post per day every day during the month of June. Granted, that is a tall order for me, but I'm sort of craving a new challenge... and if I give myself a little grace, I think I can be up for it. So, I'm thinking that it wouldn't necessarily have to be a long, drawn-out post each day... but could even be as simple as a picture I came across that I appreciate & why... or something funny that I overheard... or a short anecdotal story... It can be done. :)

So we'll see... perhaps June 1 I will start on this little blogging journey. Will you join me? :)

Don't Be Skerred

"Psht, I ain't skerred."

Now there's something you might hear me say when I'm being silly and trying to sound as gangsta as possible for a lil white 30-year old woman; but the truth is, I am "skerred." I'm scared of lots of things. Lots and lots of scary things.

Smile Though Your Heart is Breaking

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." ~Dr. Seuss

I'd love to learn to default to this. What a fantastic outlook on life... gonna have to start working on that starting today.

I love people. There have been times when someone has gotten imbedded in my heart so deeply so quickly that if I have to say goodbye for whatever reason, my heart literally breaks. If I were able to heed those words though - "Don't cry because it's over..." maybe it would be a little easier.

Stand Up

I'm learning. I'm learning that I have a certain set of callings, and the older I get, the more aware I am becoming of what they are. This post is about one of them.

This life mission has 2 ingredients. The first has to do with the fact that I've always known that I love people. All people at first. Then as they're weeded out - the good from the evil - I keep the good ones close in my heart. And there are lots of good ones. :)

The second ingredient is a deep-seated need for justice and fairness. (See post on this here: "Diary of a Crazy Cajun Lady."). There are few things that can really get me riled up, and most of the time people would consider me pretty meek & mild. But if I judge something to be either partially or entirely unfair - especially something that directly affects me or one of the above mentioned beloved - I can be quite the little pepper.

When these two come together, they can be explosive. In my heart of hearts I feel an incredible urge to push others to love themselves enough to fight for fairness in their own lives. Simply stated, I need to encourage people to stand up for themselves - because frankly, it's tiring to fight for justice 24/7 on others' behalf (Superman). You might think, "Well, Stacie, you don't have to do that," but you'd be wrong. I do.

Tech(nically) (Un)support(ive)

Are you having problems with your HTC or some other Android device? You could always scour forums on the web for hours in search of solutions to your issues. But let me tell you, everyone is having the same problem as you and will either (a) have zero answers at all; or (b) have an answer - but not one that works for you even though it seems to work for 5 out of 7 people who responded to that same post for some God-unknown reason. Of course, you could always call tech support, but please allow me to save you a little trouble on that front. The following is a frighteningly accurate representation of how that conversation will go.

Culture is more than what happens in a Petri dish...

Culture is one of those things that, after you say the word a few times, it starts to seem like it's not a real word. But it really is a real word and one I've been thinking about a little bit lately. Now, this post definitely does not seek to delve into the deeper meaning of cultural what-nots. It's just more random ramblings by your humble author. That said, here it goes...